Dad, I Need to Tell You | Ellie Braun-Haley, |
My father died in May of 1991. He left me a gift that I shall treasure always. In all the years that I knew my dad he never used coarse language. He had nine children and three of them were so close in age that one year all three boys began Grade I together (There were twins!) I know the boys were full of mischief and they constantly thought up new games (like playing stretch with a jack knife). Since the boys were very visible they were often blamed wrongfully for the deeds of others in the neighborhood. Poor dad had to field a number of complaints! Now that must have taxed both parents considerably, yet both of them took things in stride and were controlled in how they spoke, No expletives! I remember when dad decided to dig out the cellar and turn it into a basement. There was a lot of commotion, with kids, friends and neighbors all trying to get into the act. One neighbor girl stood so close to the conveyor belt that it pulled her dress right into the works! Well, no one was hurt in that episode and if dad was frustrated by it all I never could tell - not even a darn! Once one of the neighbor boys got on the roof of the garage and Dad chased him down the lane, wielding a broom and saying something about the lad acting so cockeyed smart, and that was dad's most expressive term. I think as we all got older the challenges increased for dad. Everyone wanted to ride a bike then suddenly everyone wanted to drive a car. There were accidents! Like the time an older brother had taken a younger brother for a drive and on a curve the door flew open. The younger child was thrown out onto the pavement. Mom sat over her young son all day worrying about whether he had a concussion. Dad worried but he kept his cool Through thick and thin, dad just weathered everything. He and mom never used unacceptable language! Finally the big thing happened at our house! Our driveway drove straight up to mom and dad's bedroom window. Mom had been out driving. She was still kind of green at it. Something went wrong. I don't know maybe mom got excited and hit the wrong pedal. Whoosh! The family car drove into the bedroom! Dad was stunned and he said nothing as the seconds ticked by. Then he said, "Well, are you going to sit there all day Pat, or are you going to back the car up." "I don't think I want to move it back," was her meek response. Dad said then, "Would you like to get out and I'll do it?" Later dad said one other thing about the whole affair. There was stuff sprayed all over the bedroom. The wall was a mess, although the window only had a small crack. Mom had been scheduled to go into the city and watch their grandchildren. She looked at the big mess and thought out loud that perhaps she had better not go. My dad had already said he could handle the mess, but when Mom said this dad responded with, "Pat, do you think you need to be here to hold my hand?" Dad and mom took a lot of ribbing over the years after that big thing happened. Relatives would say, "My! You were sure in a hurry to get to your bedroom!" Through it all dad just took the ribbing, along with mom. Dad kept his cool. One day after dad's death, I sat back and thought about dad and his remarkable control. I realized that my father respected and loved his children so very much that he intended to always have control over what he said. That is some powerful love! Dad and mom gave us kids the greatest gift they could give us. They gave us their love and they demonstrated throughout their lives by example that they would honor their children and respect them. Dad isn't around for me to tell him how much I appreciate the gift he gave me all those years. It isn't too late to thank mom. Dad, I know you're out there somewhere. I just wanted to thank you for your goodness. I'm never going to stop being grateful dad and I'll try to live by your example! No coarse language! Thanks (and Dad, I love you too).
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